Sunday, 18 August 2013

Cherishing priceless memories from childhood..


Doing something right, what's the first thing that comes to our mind when we hear this? For that matter, what is doing something right? There is no age for learning and therefore learning has no boundaries. Similarly, being taught from has no restrictions either. Even a kid can teach a matured person something very serious in a very easy manner which apprehends how certain things are just so miraculous that we have no answer for them. 

I've often wondered why we stop exploring the world around us at a particular age? Take example of our own selves when we were kids, wasn't the anxiety to try something new everyday a lot more as compared to today? Is it solely because our life has become a lot busier or is it just that we are not willing? I believe it's got to do a lot with how busier our lives have gotten but still, there are certain memories from childhood that when remembered by us, bring a sweet "smile" to our face. Has it ever happened that you, that you were sitting on your sofa and a childhood memory suddenly popped  into your mind and made you smile for no particular reason and someone sitting near to you asked "kya hua" - "what happened"? I'm sure this must have happened to you because it has happened with all of us.

I'm writing this blog entry for a Tata Capital contest being held on "blogadda". We have to write on "do right stories" and there are 5 themes given "honesty, integrity, kindness, respect and compassion". Through this write up I'll be writing on each 5 of them and believe me, each story will be easily connectable by you all (readers). They are real stories and not made up and they are my childhood stories or stories that were told to me during childhood that totally changed me and for good. So let's begin the experience of remembering the best moments of the childhood, comprising of the above 5 themes. 

Honesty :- In today's world, it's often said that honesty is not rewarded and if anything, you face the consequences of being honest. In childhood however there is one such instant in my life that I remember very clearly to this very date. I was about 10 years old and my older brother, 12 years older to me had just got married and I had a "bhabhi". The sudden change in my life was significant; she was more like a sister and treated me very sweetly and kindly. Due to financial crisis, my father lost his job and searched very hard to find one but couldn't. My brother seeing this had to take the brave step of accepting a job abroad which obviously promised to pay him well but he couldn't take his wife (my bhabhi), this was because he was an architect and that would mean he'd usually be away and bhabhi wouldn't be safe in an unknown country all by herself. 

My father told my elder brother to go alone and leave bhabhi. My brother being a very respectful son didn't utter a word and went abroad with a smile. My bhabhi I clearly remember used to cry because she had just got married and her husband was away. I was just 10 years old and didn't like my bhabhi crying. I was very reluctant to talk to my bhabhi about this and so one day I decided to pick up an old envelope, wrote my brother's name on it and gave it to bhabhi (forgetting however to write a letter and insert it). I told bhabhi that the letter had just come from my brother and gave her to read it. She opened the envelope and didn't find a letter, immediately she started "crying". I was absolutely frightened, I realized I had forgotten to insert a letter and not only that but had also made my bhabhi sadder.

My mother came and saw my bhabhi crying, she asked her what happened. I disappeared to the other room and a few minutes later, my mom came into the room and told me to not get worried. My father was very tensed to see what was happening (he wasn't told what had happened).. Mom asked me from where I had gotten the letter and I told her very honestly. Obviously though both mom and bhabhi had realized that I had wrote on the envelope. Mom asked me why and I told her everything, she in fact "smiled", took me to bhabhi and made me tell her everything. My bhabhi wasn't crying anymore, I was happy about that.

Bhabhi very calmly just like my mother, hugged me and looked at me (said nothing).. Just kept looking... I was very worried still as to what was bhabhi thinking. Bhabhi then said "Adit, you've done something remarkable today". You took an envelope, wrote your brother's name and gave it to me. Not thinking that you might be caught, you just wanted me to be happy. When you saw me crying, you told the truth to your mother and hid nothing. "Ye sacchai hai Adit, hamesaa aise hee rehnaa".. These words I remember to this very date.. 

What I did wasn't exactly right but I had no  wrong intention behind it, my intention was to make my bhabhi smile and she knew this. Later, I accepted my mistake and told my mother and bhabhi about this very honestly, which both of them appreciated. At this young age, what happens to you stays with you forever and hence, seeing that my honesty saved me and in fact, brought a smile to my mother's and bhabhi's face, for always made me take the road of honesty because if you do, you'll always be appreciated and rewarded. :)

Integrity :- I've always been very close to my grandfather and have always wondered - how much experience my grandfather has, he has led a life with ethics and has always deemed with the fact that living a life and earning money is easy but living a life with ethics and integrity is real life. :) 

When I was 12 years old, I remember asking grandpa "did you ever take bribery, did you ever get influenced by black money?" 

He replied "NO", very firm very strong. 

I asked "NO, kabhi to lee hogi Babuji (grandpa)"?

He replied : Naa kabhi bribe liya, naa kabhi bribe diya and stood firm on his ground, I could see the confidence in his eyes, he had a smile on his face which  was magical. It's not a huge incident but it's an incident I'll always recall whenever someone asks me why we must opt for the path of integrity. It's one of the childhood memories that will always lead me to take the right path when I have to opt between 2 crossroads, one taking me to the ethical direction and one to the non-ethical one. 

Another example is that when my father was very young, he along with his 3 brothers was staying in Bhopal. My grandfather in the early 1970's owned 4 cars, not his but of the company, he was just told to take care of them and if any visitor of the company asked, facilitate them with the vehicle. My grandfather never even drove those vehicles or used them for any personal use, my father tells me. My father also tells me that he along with his 3 brothers always wanted to sit in the car and make out the most of the luxury that they were sort of provided with but my grandfather always refused stating that "the vehicle belongs to the company, not me". This shows that he had set very high standards for himself. In spite of knowing that even if he used the car no one would utter a word as he was on a very high post but still, he maintained his integrity and passed on the same to his sons.

My grandfather is my biggest inspiration. My father always quotes him when the topic of integrity is raised. My grandfather was several times in life not promoted for his blunt honesty but never did he opt for the wrong path.. These truly are the memories which I will remember forever.. :)

Kindness :- A few years back I went to my village "tamuria" in Bihar during my summer vacations. My grandfather welcomed me with huge celebrations and it totally surprised me how many people had gathered to welcome me, I felt like a celebrity. In the days I stayed there, I experienced something very unusual. My grandfather refused to eat if rabia bhaiya (he used to do our household work) and whom my grandfather treated as his son (Rabia) didn't eat. Rabia had/has been with the family for over 50 years and has grown up with the family. Still, it surprised me how much respect my grandfather had for him, each and every day my grandfather asked first "Rabia ko khaana milaa" and if the answer was NO, my grandfather would himself go to the kitchen and prepare food, which for someone of his age (66) is remarkable. 

I quietly saw all this and it thoroughly impressed me. This shows how we must be kind to each and everyone, regardless of what job they do. Hence apprehending the true culture of India, no one is beneath or above anyone. For my babuji, rabia is a part of the family but still, it's his kindness that always makes him insure for the well being of Rabia bhaiya. I'll always remember this i.e. kindness must be maintained at all times, even the smallest of the things must not be overlooked. :)

Compassion :- Now, compassion, one of the most integral part of our life. Are we compassionate? We all have a dream, yes. We want to pursue and succeed in that dream, yes. We fight to accomplish our dream and that's compassion. I've got 2 stories to share with you all which have taught me how we must be compassionate in our life to achieve what we have pursuit to achieve. :)

As I've mentioned several times through this article, my grandfather is my source of inspiration. His stories have taught me a lot and instilled great learning's in me. Another learning I got from my grandfather is, he once told me that he used to travel via cycle to his office (which was 15 KM one way and then 15 again to come back). Not only this, he used to stay alone at the age of 21, imagine that! At 21, he used to come back from work, wash his shirt and pant, press them and then wear them the next day, this was because he had money to buy just 1 pair of them. In such circumstances, his willpower was always strong and he was very determined to succeed in life. It makes me proud to say that I'm proud of my grandfather, he is truly the glorious beacon of light, from which we all can get inspiration. :)

Next story is of my father. When my father got his first job, he didn't know how to speak English and to enable him from working comfortably, everyone around him was very fluent in English. My father tells me he was often neglected because he didn't know how to speak in English but it was his willingness to improve and get better that he worked upon his English, built up his confidence and in the next few years consistently worked on his English. Further, he started giving training to employees which is a task of highly communicative people. Today, he is a well established trainer, having a PG in training. This story apprehends how we must keep on improving and if we're willing, we can certainly achieve the unthinkable. :)

Respect :- At every point of life, we must be respectful to others. We are taught this from a very young age and must abide by this. Saying this, there is a childhood incident of mine that I remember. I was 5 years old and my grandfather was sleeping. There was a bottle of oil near to him and I heard my grandfather saying in the evening that "his legs are hurting". I always saw my father putting on that oil to my grandfather's feet and massaging him, I remembered this and did the same. Took a little oil, looked around to make sure that my parent's aren't around because they'd stop me and then I started putting the oil to my grandfather's feet and then from my small hands, started massaging him. My grandfather woke up and saw me, after that it's remarkable the smile that he had on his face. He said "maalish kar raha hai betaa".. I nodded. My grandfather got emotional and told me "koi nehi beta, main theek hun" and told me to go to sleep and told "subhratri beta". 

Next day, grandpa told this to my parents who were so proud of me that they gave me a whole pack of "chocolate" the very next day, I clearly remember. This was because they wanted to appreciate the respect I had for dada ji. :) It's an incident that apprehends the respect I had and still have for my grandfather. I was just 5 but wanted to do something to insure that my grandfather's feet don't hurt anymore. I did nothing huge, just put on some oil and massaged but that made my grandfather so happy. This very day, I learned the true meaning of "respect" and now would forever be respectful to everyone because in simple words "it makes me and it will make you too, feel good".. :)

In the very first story, under "honesty" I mention that my father had lost his job. To enlighten you further on that, my father lost his job because of being bluntly honest. My father was being shifted to a very far place and having a family, my father couldn't go. He requested but his seniors did not support him, having no option but to resign, my father had to take the brave step of resigning. For the next 2 years, my father was unemployed. During this, I always saw him motivated that one day or the other, he'd certainly get a job. Seeing all this, my father's older brother, did all the efforts to get him his job back.

My chacha ji respected my father very hugely, for him my father meant the world. My chachi ji used all his contacts, worked with sheer dedication and even took holidays from his own job to go and meet his older friends in order to help his brother regain his job. My chacha ji's greatness was, he told no one about all this and did everything by his own without anyone's help. His hard work paid off and finally after 2 years, my father got his job back. A few months later we go to know that Chacha ji had been working consistently to help my father regain his job. That was the greatness of the man; we've always had so much respect for him because he always believed in "selfless service" and always helped people when they needed him and not when HE needed them. This story has taught me a lot, has instilled me with great moral values and makes me believe, that if you're honest to yourself, everyone around you will help you and further, selfless service is something that's always rewarded. :)

Thank you, 
I hope you had a good read :)

I am sharing my Do Right Stories at BlogAdda.com in association with Tata Capital.
Aditya Jha Author

Aditya Jha is 20 years old and has had a passion for writing since a young age. He has had the great honor of being published in the book "blank space", which featured his fictional short story "a writer's tale". He has also published 2 ebooks - Best.Generation.Ever. and An Iron Lady (Autobiography on his grandmother's life). He has great passion for speaking and is a Delhi University Debator - having won various laurels for his speaking.

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